Quick Blog Post: You Failed

I was half serious and half joking that night when I asked you.
I was only testing you out and apparently you failed.
In the end, you gave up. 

You gave me up.

I don't know how to start this, here I am writing about you again, We may not have so much memories of being together but one thing is for sure, I liked you, I still do yet it wasn't as if I didn't know. Of course I do know, we will somehow get to this point. I was only quick to make statements after hearing you say those heartbreaking apologies. I was so quick to cover my heart from breaking only to find out that they've already fallen to pieces. Ang sakit but I took it all in. I sugarcoated your words and forced myself to believe that this is for the best.

I have to make a stand, not just for myself but for my heart as well.
I didn't wait this long for nothing. Moreover, waste another chapter of my life loving the wrong one. I anticipated your apologies coz that's all you can managed to say. I acknowledged them but it's not something I could swallow in one shot. I don't even think I could forgive you. 

You were such a beautiful liar my love.
You put on quite a good show and I was a fool to assume everything.
I thought you love me. 
You said you do. 
You were so good at acting like you really did.
You caressed my hair every time.
You touched my nose and smiled.
You leaned your head against my shoulder.
You looked at me like I was the finest art.
And so I thought "Ah maybe he really likes me". 
You gave me some of the sweetest memories I could ever think of that I'd forgot I lost my heart to you along the way.

It was such a pity. I thought you and I..
I thought we can make "us" possible in time.
I exerted effort coz I believed in us.
But I will break my own heart if I continue waiting and will expect too much from you. I've been wanting to stay while you fix yourself but my impatient heart grew tired. This is something I'd never imagined myself doing;
Taking in a broken-hearted guy, accepting all his flaws and loving him despite knowing that I'll shatter myself for doing so.

For the record, you reminded me of someone from my past.
I realized that I always give chances to people who in the end, needed to break away from me. I think I'm magical, I can distinguish people from the worth keeping to the ones who don't. Sadly, you fall into that category; the one who is not worth keeping.

Let's officially part our ways. Let's not see each other again as it will just break my heart all over again. Don't come up to me anymore coz that would be hard for me to let you go and I might change my mind.

I know I'm stronger and I will always be but for now,
I think I still love you.



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